Why Not Me?

By Shelley Ann Brandon on September 8, 2010

I miss you more than anyone can see

And in my brokenness I cry “Why me?”

Why me God?  What didn’t I do? This isn’t what was supposed to be!

Oh dear Lord, what went wrong? Why God? Why me?

Why did I lose the one I loved, this one I held so dear?

Whose breath was mine and pulse was mine, this one who forever should to me be near,

Why God? Why?………… Why me?

This shouldn’t be happening to me!

But, why not me?

What makes me more significant than these?

What of the grandparents who daily attend

The tiny stone-less grave of their infant grandson, who even in their grief do bend

To water plants at my beloved’s grave, and call to check on me.

Why me?  Why not me?  Why them?

Why not me?

What makes me better, one who should be exempt from pain,

Than the man who humbly stands in line, head down to hide his shame

Job lost, home and family gone… was this his choice in life to make

Am I better than he Lord that my life should know nothing but gain?

Why me?  Why him?

Why not me?

Who am I except by accident of birth

Better off than the African mother on the other side of the earth

Who daily watches her babies from starvation die

And can do nothing but hold them as tears fall from her helpless eyes

Who am I Lord, who am I?

My aching heart begs again to cry out “Why me?”

But my memories of you Love are too strong to let that be

You, who never once asked, “Why me?”

Whose only request of God instead

Was, “Use me Lord, I am not dead”

And “I know that you are not finished yet with me.  Use me Lord”

Please use me.